


A silver lining

by Twilightzion



Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anger, But i acually liked the cute moments, Calm Moments, Child Abuse, Crash Landing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friendship, Have a silver lining in it ;), Hurt, Mention of Death, Mirage - Freeform, Original Character(s), Protective Mirage, Silver tape is gods gift to the unworthy, Talking, What Was I Thinking?, frendship, funny moment, god this taging was depresing, guardrian bond, knight in shiny armor, meantion of suecide, thousen question game
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-28
Updated: 2020-03-01
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:27:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22944766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twilightzion/pseuds/Twilightzion
Summary: Life in the countryside is really not easy for Katja. But a stormy summer night changes her entire life when a damaged Autobot takes shelter in her barn. / takes Place between the second and third Movie/ Warnings inside /
Comments: 6
Kudos: 10





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING!  
> This story is rated M and explicit for a reason.  
> There WILL be some trigger situation, both with mention of suicide, active abuse, and bad languish.
> 
> Where there is a more trigging part, I will put up a notice for you to see. You have now been warned...  
> For those of you who still want to read the story, enjoy and do tell me what you think.

She could hear her heartbeat pulsing loud as hard drumming beats in her ears, and they only increased in speed as she started to wake up. She was lying on a hard surface and she could feel the cold seeping through her clothes and eating into her structure. The taste of sweet metal in her mouth caused her stomach to turn around itself in discomfort, threatening to empty the little food she had eaten that day. She tried to take a deep breath but the blistering pain shot through her chest making her moan in pain instead.

It was in moments like this that she wished her dag had gone a little bit further in his beating and kill her instead. This Pain she was in right now was pure torture, and she wished that he could put an end to the endless suffering he was putting her through. It was like a bad wheel of destiny. Slowly she tried to move her fingers to try them out and even the smallest movement of her hands was sluggish and uncoordinated but nothing was broken. As she started to come more to it, she could feel her whole body was on fire, and the only place that didn't hurt was the face and it was the only place that would never be decorated with this kind of bruises.

She slowly sat up and let a painful gasp escaped her dry lips as the hard cutting feeling stabbed her right in her torso. She stopped for a moment but then started to slowly ease up until she sat with her back against the cold wall as support as the whole room was spinning around.

How long exactly had she been out?

Fuck, this time was probably the worst of all, and as soon as she had come home from school, she had felt that something was not right. It had been in the air, vibrating, suffocating her before she even could do anything or even know what she had done to trigger it. And her bad feeling had been confirmed after she had walked a little further into her house and the first thing she had seen of her father had been a muscular arm holding an empty whiskey bottle so hard that the fingers were white. The silence lay like a dense blanket over them and the only thing that broke it was the warm sound of the fireplace where the wood logs burned and gave some heat to the otherwise cold house. They had turned off the heater over the summer when they managed with the only fireplace as an additional heat source.

It was just my dad and me along with three cows, two sheep and four goats living in one of our larger barns. The nearest neighbor was a reasonable distance away.

It was hard, her father had a job in the city and she one to, an extra job that is, but it didn't give a lot of money but some. They lived out in the woods about 15 minutes from the nearest village. But the rest went to drugs or alcohol; not much food was brought home. It sometimes happens when her dad felt like it. She should be happy that he remembered to buy animal food.

Her mother died years ago in the accident that happened in Mission city. The median quieted down everything and tried to put all the blame on terrorists at first, but last year the truth had come out. She knew they were not alone in the universe, what an idiotic thought, do people know how big the galaxy is and how much we haven't even discovered yet? And people thought we were the most intelligent being there. And she had been there together with her mother when everything had happened. She had seen these big robots fighting.

One of the blue-eyed robots had managed to rescue her, but her mother had fallen victim to one of the evils one. But with the facts in hand, her life would have been so much better if she had also died that day. But the world was not that forgiving to give her peace. On this very day, her father had lost his job, and he had taken it all out on her.

She slowly forces herself to rise with the help of the wall and had to lean to it wholly so that she would not fall. The house was now completely dark and silent, except for a few loud snoring noises from the living room from the monster that rested there. With her hand along the wall, she slowly began to move out into the hall and she bit down on her lip to hold back all the small noise that wanted to leave her body and she once again felt the taste of blood.

Why? Why did her dad do this to her? And why couldn't she escape? Why did it feel like she was forced to stay against her will? But she knew why. It was because maybe... perhaps one day her father would wake up and be the dad she still could remember.

But that day was not today.

With great difficulty, she reached the upper floor and walked to her room and slowly closed the door behind her as careful as she could, afraid to make even the smallest noise. But as soon as the door was closed, it felt like a barrier had been brought up and everything that wanted to hurt her was on the other side. She was in her safety zone. The tears started to run down her cold cheeks. Thankfully she had her toilet, and she limped over to the opened door and turned on the light. But as she did that, she had to hold back the impulse to turn it off again as fast.

In front of her stood a horrible ghost.

There was no other word that would fit the creature that was staring right back at her. The hair was in a light blonde color, almost white and thin, where it hung in tangled tassels over the shoulders. The slender figure of the ghost was slightly bent forward and the pain was visible in her haunted face. The thin t-shirt was ripped and would only be fit to throw in the waste bin as it hung half of one of the ghost shoulders. Underneath the broken fabric, she could see spots of pale skin that now were marbled with purple and blue bruises.

The ghost skin was pale like alabaster due to lack of sun over several years, and now it was adorned with angry reddish bruises and along the waist, a red spot had begun to spread at an angle. But the worst thing about the horrible creature was its eyes. The amber eyes were lifeless and glossy with large tears falling down the pale cheeks and they were stared right back at her. Accusatory, judgmental and cold, like they told her it was all her fault that she was like this. It was all her fault that her father abused her; she could not fight back. Why would she? For herself? No, she was better off dead; if she had been strong enough, she surely would have taken her own life. But she could not; there was something she never could do. She had tried but not be able to complete the action.

She stared at the ghost that was a shell of the one who once had stood there before as a proud young woman of 15 summers. She still remembered her name, Katja, and she uses to have so much life in her and laughter. But it had been some times her father had looked at her and called her that, nowadays he could not stand the mere presence of her.

Katje sighted as she slowly began to take off her sweater to inspected her torso. Bruises old and new not only adorned her front but the back as well. She grimaced again of the persistent pain as she slowly started to massage a softening ointment on the discolored skin.

After what felt like an eternity, but it was only 20 minutes, she had taken care of all the bruises. She went into her bedroom and lay down on the hard bed and breathed out. The fatigue tightened on her senses and her head was spinning even though she kept her eyes closed and was lying completely still as it always did when her emotions were all over the place.

Katja cast a quick look at her alarm clock, which only showed 8 pm but it didn't matter; her whole being was beaten and she could sleep for a day if she could. Tomorrow was Saturday and no school and with the amount of alcohol her father had poured into him, he was probably going to sleep for a while. Thank god for that! She breathed out and sunken deeper down in her bed as she hugged her pillow tighter to her face as she slowly let the sleep stealing her consciousness and prayed for a dreamless night.

**WHRAAA...BOOM...**

The walls shook violent all around the house, the glass on the windows rattling with the outside force that hit them. Katja woke up with a jerk, causing her to bend forward in the sudden pain that shot through her stiff body at the movement. "Fuck," she gasps in pain as the motion was a remainder to her body that she was not alright. She hid her head in her pillow as she felt the shakes all around her ebbed only leaving a stubborn ringing sound in her ears.

"what the hell was that?" she exhaled as the edge of her pain subdue, and she got up too looked out of the dark window, but saw nothing. Suddenly, nature shone up on the outside on its own in a mighty bang and seconds later the rain fell hard and stunned to the window. Katja held an arm hard pressed around her waist. The thunder roared once again over them and the wind ripped through the trees as it veered around the house.

Katja held her breath for a second as she peered out into the thick darkness that was occasionally lit up by flashes that shook the walls yet again. She couldn't hear her father's voice or movements in the house so he was probably still entirely out of it. He would probably not even wake up if the house caught fire and burned down. She looked at the time that showed 2 am, and yet if he wakens up at this hour, he would fall asleep again with no care in the world. He had never been a night person.

She exhaled again and went to her drawers and took out the pain-relieving tablets that she hid in there. She pressed two pieces and swallowed them without any water and could literary feel the pills in her thought slowly falling, and she didn't care.

The storm was now all around them, and with the rain and thunder, she would not get any more sleep now. She grimaced when she could hear faint sounds from the barn as the animals sounded scared and if she heard it from this distance, they were terrified of something.

She went to the window and pushed it open and tried to listen intently only to the sound of the animals; she really hoped that she heard wrong. But of course, was the world still against her as she could listen to them and she closed the window before putting on the first best-hooded sweater she found lying around. Slowly, she started to sneak out of the house and drew on only a raincoat that was hanging in one of the cabins before she was venturing into the raging storm.

The barn was probably 20 meters in from the main house, and she held her cloak close to her while she tried to move as fast as she could. The closer she came, the louder the sound of their fear became and with already stiffed fingers she opened the small door and was not ready on the wind caught that it would undo and lost its grip on it, the door slammed into the wall with a loud bang and Katja swore loudly as she took a harder hold on it and slammed it behind her again. She put on the new harp so that it would not fly up accidentally.

Soon she was inside the barn's safe walls and could successfully close out the raging storm that probably would get worse. She could hear how the animals walked around in their boxes anxiously. Her eyes landed on the massive cargo door that usually was only open on the day, but they always often closed it…. and it was her responsibility. And she had completely forgotten to do them this evening... for apparent reason. 

Katja ran back to the large metal door and started to pull on it sideways as the rain and hard wind hit her face. She pulled harder and finally got the door in motion, and soon the storm's loud sounds were closed out completely. She breathed in a hard and leaned her head against the vast and cold metal as she felt the vibration in its surface from the force of mother nature. 

Seconds ticked by, and she started to recover from the internal pain one moment overtook her. But thanks for the pain medicine still in her system, it ebbed out and let her arms fall beside her once again. She turned around with the mission to get back to her warm bead and sleep for at least a hundred years or so. But stopped when she saw something that obviously was not supposed to be there, and when it suddenly started to moved she throw herself back at the metal door with a loud, startled scream as she stared up at it as she grabbed the first thing her hand landed on

She raised the pitchfork in front of her in a small attempt to create some security but a movement of his weapon swiftly went to take away the little bit of safety she had claimed. That was a freaking sword the robot swung around with and Katja stared down at the split handle and she quickly released the remaining pieces and held her hands up in the air with a yelp. 

"Please don't kill me," she squealed and closed her eyes because if it were one of the bad ones, he would likely kill her anyway. It was like Mission city all over again. But the fatal motion never came and she dared to look at the intruder. The storm damped a lot of noise he was making but she could hear squeaking sound coming from the black intruder as he tried to hold his sword steady in front of him in a protective motion.

Katja swallow hard as she dared to lift her gaze to meet his….blue stare? …. not red…. so was he one of the good ones?. None of them made an attempt to move and only stared at each other, his eyes...or was it optics flickered and she could see sparks fly from various parts of his body. 

She swallowed hard and slowly lowered her arms. “I'm not going to hurt you,” she said in a calm voice as she internal snorted at that thought. Perhaps she should be proud that a huge kick-ass robot saw her as a threat, as she ever could hurt a freaking enormous robot! Even if he was damaged. She heard a faint moan and the metallic sound of the sword against metal when he couldn't hold his arm up anymore. In a closer look, she could see that he wasn't holding the sword; it was strapped on his underarm.

"H-hey ..... are ..... you... okay? " she asked in a low voice but got no answer as his eyes had gone out entirely now but the sound from his body continued with strange hiccup noises.

Katja felt her feet give out on her, and she collapsed on the littered ground. She stared down at her hands that were shaking and she tried to calm down her breath that was coming out hard, causing pain to blossom in her chest. It felt as if her head was separated from the rest of her body and a frantic sensation swept over her.

What the hell just happened? Why was there a freaking Cybertronian in her barn? What was he doing here? She grabbed hold of her damp hair and leaned slightly forward and tried to get her breathing under control as she was breathing to fast. 

Should she tell her dad? No, that was out of the question. Her whole body shook and she could not be still as she started to sway forward gently and then back again. The tingling sensation spread across her arms and down her throat and chest as she tried to calm her breathing. She needed to get oxygen in her lungs and she knew that she had a panic attack.

 _Breath in…..and out….. count in a square._ She chanted in her mind as she slowly started to calm down. 

The humming sounds of the intrude were irregular and she could now also see turquoise liquid flowing down between the black plates. 

Katja slowly stood up and on shaking legs as she had calmed down and she slowly started to walk to the fainted robot. The sound of clogged fans that hooked up on itself hit her as soon as she was beside it, together with low swishy noise. He did not notice her presence and was out of it. She swallowed hard and gently placed a hand on the nearest body part, which was one colossal leg, the metal under her hands was cold and wet from the rain. She looked down at her hand that was covered in soot, had he been in a fire or maybe a fight? But in that case, they should have heard more sounds. Could it be that he has just arrived?

But what could she do? If her conclusions were right, this was an Autobot. One of the good robots that fought to protect humanity. Oh fuck, she stared down at her hand as the information hit her straight in the face.

There were a damn Autobots in her barn! 

Katja stared up at the robot's face and tried to see if there was any light in them but saw nothing; the Autobot was completely knocked out. She stared at it for a moment before deciding. Quickly, she pulled together most of the blankets she had for the animals and began to spread them gently over him. All the while, she was vigilant on the slightest movement that could alert her if he was awake. 

When she had laid out all the blankets she could find, she noticed that some turquoise liquid was beginning to stain one of them. Meaning he leaked somewhere. 

“Oh come one!” she sighed and pulled her fingers through her hair; she didn't need more tasks to do. What could she of all people do?. She was the most non-technical person in the whole school. No, scratch that, the entire community

She was proud of herself that she even how to use an ordinary computer mouse and search for the computer. But after that, all her knowledge of everything technological stopped, and even her phone was an old faithful Nokia 3310, a brick compared to today's advanced smartphones. Then what on this holy planet was _she_ going to do with a super advance transforming robot? She chewed on her lower lip and looked around her. There had to be something she could use to stop the leak. 

_Think_ , _think Katja_. Her eyes suddenly fell on the silvery tape. Nooo, surely she could not use that, right?. But then again what else could she use?. She looked back at the ever so growing part of the turquoise liquid that was spreading on the blanket. If she did nothing, he would die anyway, so why not make the most use of it? 

She picked up the silver tape and a pair of larger gloves they used when working. It was a strenuous work of first find all the leaks, and then get her smaller hands around the slippery cables while the liquor steady pulsed out. It was strange how warm it was, and the smell of it was sweet. The only problem was that there were so many of them. But after a while, she could not find any more obvious leaks and stepped back and used her semi-clear sleeve to wipe off the sweat and soot from her face. That took longer than she had thought. She tried to get rid of the liquor that had fallen on some part of her skin, and there was no way of telling if it was poisonous to someone like her or not. 

After looking over the robot one last time, she felt how the fatigue began to be to mush for her sore body. Outside the barn, she could hear that the storm had subsided and she really couldn't even think the thought of getting back to the house and up the massive stairs. She swayed slightly on the spot as she felt a new wave of tiredness come over her all at the same time. And this time, without even having a chance to decide what to do, she collapsed in the hay pile as sleep overtook her whole mind. 

\---

A/N:  
Hello folks, hope you liked it so far! This is going to be a miniseries with 4 or 5 chapters and they are all written already so expect an update soon.


	2. Chapter 2

The next time Katja opened her eyes, she felt the headache pulsate behind her temple, and her eyes felt like someone had decided to pour a handful of sand into them.

She breathed in deeply, feeling a small stab of pain as she did that but loved the scent of fresh hay and rain that filled her senses. Somewhere she could hear the moving bodies of the animal and some chewing that was comfortable enough almost to lull her back into sleep. It took her a little while to understand that she was sleeping in the barn, but why was she sleeping there? 

But as soon as she remembered the events of the night, she quickly opened her eyes and dazzled by the light that met her, and she put her arm over her eyes and moaned again with regret. Why did she never learn?. She lay there and listening for some time while her eyes got more comfortable with the light and she looked up at the old and dirty railings.

Katja turned her head to the left and saw the black robot was sitting in the same place where she had left him, and she was holding her breath as she listened. The low soothing sound the robot made flushed over her in soft waves, telling her that he still was alive. 

She stretched her sore arms and tried to rub out any lumps that come during the night in her muscles as she inspected the black robot from her position. Something told her that this was one of the male forms of the cybertronians; the females had been more sleek and...female?. But then again, they had only been on the news for a small amount of time. 

Katja stared at him for a moment before she decided that it was time to start her chores, he would wake up, and he did. She gave all the animals her food before walking into the house. 

But before she did anything else, she took two more pills and quickly jumped into the shower that felt wonderful. The warm water rinsed away soot and the turquoise liquid that settled on her unprotected body parts. Her body was still really sore since yesterday, but it was also something she learned to live with. Katja quickly put her hair up in a messy high ball and put on one of the bigger thick sweaters she loved to ware, even in the summer. 

The first thing she did was to clean up after her father, who was still completely knocked out on the couch snoring. He had one of his vast arms rested over his eyes, and saw the coffee stains and guaranteed whiskey soiled the white linen he was wearing.

Katja went back to the kitchen and started to mess around in the cupboards but didn't find much food there, which made her stomach scream even more. But no surprise there. She grabbed a small package of pops and started to eat straight out of the carton.

The sky was in a dark gray hue and threatened with a new session of rain any time now. But the animal wanted to out after their breakfast, and she let them. The cargo door was now halfway open as she glanced back at the sleeping body. She went slowly closer to see if he was still alive and felt satisfied when she heard the soft clicking noise. Katja nodded as she put on one more blanket, not knowing if the robot could get cold or not. But he _was_ in bad shape so perhaps it could help? 

All weekend she kept in the barn and sometimes broke into the house to do everything that her father would be upset again or get the idea that he would help in the barn.

And he showed no tendency to wake up even after the weekend, and when the school day came, she was a bundle of nerves. She could not also remember even one thing that the teacher said or anyone for that matter. The only thing that was on her mind was that of the sleeping robot in her barn and the danger of her father finding him out. But he didn't, and she had tried to watch the TV every day for any information about the Autobots and if maybe someone would mention something on the news but nothing was said. 

Surely his comrades had to look for him... Right? 

Wednesday came and went, and on the fourth day after school, she was working on an assignment on the opposite of the black body as she looked up at him, deep in thoughts.

He must be in some coma; there was no other way to explain it. Katja put the book down and went over to him to check on the temporary repairs she had put on him. She couldn't help but laugh a little. Now there is a new area of use for the silver tape. Mending cybertronians! Who knew?. Too bad she couldn't tell her discovery. But at least it seemed to work. 

And her dad had stayed away from the animals. He had even apologized and given her both chocolate and a new damn phone witch she had no idea how to work with, and frankly, she didn't need it. _Who would she call and talk with? Her friends?_ She thought ironically, shaking her head. No one wanted to know about her, so it didn't matter. But she didn't tell him.

But she had seen this behavior before, Katja exhaled as she felt like everything was in vain anyway. In a few weeks he would be there again, he always behaved this way when he had gone a little too .... far. 

Katja scratched one of the goats standing at the opening of the pen, as she looked out over the landscape that was in front of her. Trees surrounded their whole farm, and the forest stretched as far aa one could see. But in some parts, it was more space and she could see the cows walk around and eating the fresh grass. 

She looked to the left where she knew that not far from them, was one of the more massive rivers. On the good days, and if the wind was right, one could hear the hard rushing sound of thousand gallons of water rush down a fall with breathtaking speed and power. Katja closed her eyes and took a deep breath, school that day had been a tough one. Again, she had been harassed once again by some of the older students. They had deliberately dropped her work on the ground and stepped on it, destroying most of the paper, so she had to rewrite all the stuff. Katja rubbed her eyes and annoyed the tears that stubbornly tried to escape from her eyes but she did not let them. 

There was no way that she would cry over them, never. She turned around to get back to work but let out a gasp of surprise as she noticed sky blue eyes staring down at her with an intense and waken gaze. For a second, none of them moved, and they only stared at each other; he was still sitting in the same position he had done the last week. He did nothing to show if he wanted to hurt her or even try and get up, no one spoke and after what felt like an eternity, she couldn't take the silence anymore.

"nice to see that you woke up,"

She started to walk forward, to him carefully; he didn't move his body, only his eyes followed her as she came closer to him. She saw how he cast a glance behind her towards the half-open door and then back towards her and she couldn't help to smile. He was alive! It didn't matter if she was the one who did it or if he still would have been able to handle the damage of his own. Whatever it was, he was alive and she had to hold back a joyful giggle. 

"Can you understand me?"

Blue eyes stared down at her without saying anything. 

"Can .... you ... understand ... me?" she asked again slowly and with more significant accusations then before, and when she did that, she could have sworn that she saw him rolling his eyes at her! Was that even possible? 

"Yes, I understand you perfectly human" His voice was dark and filled with static and very much the one of a man, and if she did not mishear things, he had an Italian dialect?

"Oh...good... that's good" she nodded "How do you feel? You have been completely knocked out for days now; I was starting to worry that you never would wake up."

He examined her again and did not respond for a while, and she opened her mouth to ask another question. Perhaps he was slow on the uptake of the languish?. But he heaved out a loud ventilation sound.

"You don't have to repeat yourself," he said, “I do understand you perfectly” he was moving a little bit, let the sword back wherever he protected it with, and in doing so, making a creaky sound. 

"Don't move too much, you are still injured," she said, rushing forward towards him when she saw that he tried to get up, and she put a hand on his leg plating.

He blinked down at her in something that could only be surprised and then down at his body, quite right to her words. He got a glimpse of the silvery mass that she had wrapped around his energies cables in his arm. And he could only guess that the damage he had in his chassis and waist looked the same. Oh, Ratchet would have a field day when he heard about this.

"Did you do this human?" he then asked as static filled his voice, he reset the vocal box and coughed at the strange sensation that ran through his neck. Her small hand was still resting on his leg, but he could not feel it and did not care. She was not a threat. 

"Yes, sorry that it is not so good.” she scratched nervously at her arm. "It wasn't like you came up with a manual how I could help you, and the name is Katja, not human," she said as she looked up at him again.

He nodded and looked down at his arm again as he lifted it slightly; the data report that came back was terrible, to say the least. His system was working overtime as it was, and his fuel level is dangerously low. 

"I know it's not much, but I didn't know what to do” The human femme spoke again, Katja, he corrected himself, and he looked down at her. So this is the human race the Prime had mentioned in the data packaged he had received before he had crashed. They didn't look that important. The human looked week and unimportant. 

“ Do you have anyways, so can you contact your friends? I've tried to keep a lookout for any Autobots in the city and on the roads but haven't seen anything. Know them where you are?" the human continued with her question, and he stared down at her and had to keep from grimace, of all the creatures he could encounter; it was a human Blurr. His processor could not handle it right now. He leaned back against the bar and exhaled. None of his functions worked as they would, and the communication, both short and long, was out of order. He was stuck. 

"no," he answered all her questions abruptly and closed his optics again; he should be happy that he was still alive and everything. As it was now, everything indicated that it was this little femme so-called patch job that was the main reason that he still was functional and not traveling together with his family and friends in the well of all sparks. He had no idea if he should feel disappointed or happy.

But suddenly her words were registered in his processor, and he looked down at her "Do you know Autobots? I thought they were undercover and kept away from the inhabitants of this planet?"

She shook her head, "I don't know them, but a few years ago so .... you could say that their existence came out in the light...Thanks to the Decepticons. No one sees them, but they know that the Autobots are there. I have heard, however, that they should have a base somewhere on the mainland but it can also be rumors," she sighed and sat down on one of the hay bales next to him. He completely ignored her presence and looked down at his knee that was most damaged and tried to process her words. He was stuck here for now. 

"So, what's your name?" she asked after a moment of silence, and his eyes were directed down at her once again as he debated with himself if it was such a good idea to interfere with an insignificant and small being. But as it was, he could at least give her his designation. Perhaps she would mute it after that?

"Mirage... or Dino works just as well. pick whatever"

"Well, Mirage, what are you going to do now?" she asked, and he had to hold back an annoying groan as one more question came out of her oral port. He did not have the patience to listen to her. His processor pulsed painfully, and he could not even move without the pain shooting through his sensors like wildfire.

“What do you think?” his voice dropped out of sarcasm and mixing it with his Italian dialect, "At this moment nothing," he said to the obvious question. Didn't the human work the way she should? Maybe she was one of the more injured people who couldn't read a situation?

"Excuse me," she said and snorted low "Didn't mean to say anything offensive with my question, and you don’t need to snap at me, are all the Autobots this ungrateful? "

“Yes, we are, when the only thing you say is the obvious” Mirage looked down at her " Are all the people on this planet equally stupid or are you just one of a kind?"

Katja stared at him with her mouth hanging open but closed it with a snapping smile and felt the anger bubbling beneath the surface. She knew that she probably was overwhelming him, but she had been så nervous for him this week, and now when he was awake, she had a million questions!. 

But how dare he call her stupid because of that and here she thought that the Autobots would be the kind one of them. But perhaps it was some rotten egg amongst them too, especially when the first thing he does after he is waking up is to be a fucking diva and a snappy one of that. But she didn't need to hear that word from a stranger! That she had probably saved the life of.

She got up quickly, still glared at the black robot "okay, if it is that way" she went to the gasoline dunk she managed to snake out of her dad's car and she grabbed it with both of her hands as she threw it straight at him, aiming at his head but of course missing it as the dunk bounced off his chest and down into his lap. 

" Fuck off," she growled the last words as she stomped away from the barn and wanted to scream at the sky, but she held it in and kicked a stone that was in her path—fucking damn Autobot, with his snarky attitude and selfish, ungrateful behavior.

She went into the house and slammed the door behind her so hard that the photos on the wall were rattling. Thankfully, her dad was not home, he had gone to the city to try and find a job, or he had been on her like a vulture over a carcass. Katja rubbed her face in frustration. Who did he think he was? The Queen of England? Noo, he was a massive dick of the fucking dick-land! Katja growled out loud again in frustration as she walked into the kitchen and put the dished hard down in the sink where it should be. 

It was as if all the nervousness she had stored up within him like a tightrope finally came off and put it in sheer anger. Soto get rid of all the pent up emotions and energy, Katja began to clean the entire house. She knew she had more homework to do, but right now, she didn't have the power of focus even to do one of the tasks and she refused to go back out in the barn to collect them.

Katja cleaned the whole house, and as time ticked away, she could feel the emotions slowly ebbing away she glanced at the clock, and her dad still hadn't come home. Her stomach made a hungry noise and she opened the fridge and grimaced as there was nothing edible in there. She picked up an apple and bit into the red surface, enjoyed the sweet taste that filled her mouth.

As the darkness was upon them, she realized that she needed to bring in the animals. But she didn't want to going out to the barn yet. She had calmed down, and yes, she knew that she perhaps had pressed him too much. She pulled a hand through the white hair and gripped it tightly so that the pain spread from her scalp and down her back. Should she apologize? Perhaps, but maybe not today because she still felt like the smallest wrong thing would set her off again. 

_Oh, come on, you can ignore him forever._ She sighed again, and before she lost her courage, she walked outside for the first time that day.

The air had started to get a little bit chillier as the autumn soon would be upon them. She could even see some of the trees shifting color into a more yellow or orange hue. Katja opened the door to the barn, and without also looking at the large intruder, she began to feed and prepare for the animals to enter. She rattled loudly with the cans, and by doing so, she could hear the cows come closer and bellowed on the outside, waiting to get in for the night.

The whole time she brought in the animals, she ignored the presence of Mirage, but she could feel his gaze following her movements. When she was finally done, the darkness was over them, and she closed the large cargo door and locked it with an audible click. Within her, she congratulated herself on having succeeded in ignoring the unpleasant Autobot the whole time. He wanted silence and no question, He got it, but hell was it hard to keep it all in. There was so much she wanted to know, and the more she was thinking on it the more question popped up in her mind. But it helped that he also hasn't said anything and perhaps they both needed to cool down some more, and he was probably still tired.

She started to walk towards the exit, but suddenly a sizeable grayish hand was placed in front of her.

Katja slowly followed the arm up to his face for the first time that evening. "What?" she snapped, would he continue to tell how worthless and idiotic she was? How useless was she?. She could not help that she had to do the animals if her mear presence annoyed him; he had to suck it up for the time being. She had already made up her mind not to talk to him this evening so that they both could calm down. Or at least her. 

"I want to apologize," his voice was low, and he looked straight at her. "I took my annoyance out on you and it wasn't my intention," continued Mirage as he slowly pulled back his arm from her path.

"Was that all?" she asked, crossing her arms in front of her.

He looked at her for a moment before silently bowing his head, "hmm... thank you for your help? I appreciate it," he said and gave her a wry smile.

“Not that part.” 

He had an uncomprehending gaze while he inspected her, what more could he say?

Katja stared at him but then exhaled, the anger she had had towards him had begun to ebb out anyway, and she was not one to hold a grudge. Their feelings were still there, but she could also admit that she reacted a little too emotionally. "Okay, forget it, you're forgiven."

He gave a low rumblings sound as he could not understand this femme, was all of the humans this….difficult? "That was easy, are you certain?" he asked her again, only to make sure. If he had to stay here, he at least needed information as of the moment; he could not get it on his own, so the only way he would get it, sadly enough, was through this human.

"Do you want me to be angry with you?" she raised an eyebrow, and he examined her again before he gave something that resembled a crooked smile.

"No, thank you."

“Good,” Katja turned around and put down her bag, “but I still have a question.” 

“Only one?”

“Alright, no, it like a zillion now.” 

He gave away a hitching sound as she slowly shook his helm, "Oh primus, help me."

"Whoever this Primus is, he can help you if you want. But as long as you are here, you can see that as my payment" she grinned up at him, more sure of herself as she sat down on the hay

"Now to question number one....."


	3. Chapter 3

Mirage stared down at the strange creature in an attempt to figure out what it wanted. He had no idea what it was doing there staring at him like it was another calm day on the farm, with it was, but that was not important. If he had his usual frame job, he would have gone ballistic over the dirt and scratches the animal created on his frame. But as it was of now, it didn't matter as his natural color had burned off as he passed through the planet's atmosphere, and he was full of deep scratches and torn metal after the fight.

But what he could not understand right here and now was why the strange creature was staring right at him with this scary eyes. A grass straw hung from its mouthpiece, and the beast began to chew on it, making the straw sway up and down before it completely was swallowed—all of which it did without breaking eye contact with him. So far, he could not detect any danger from the creature. However, Mirage did not dare to move as the strange creature Katja called a goat, at risk that he would hurt the thing as it was playing climbing posture on his frame or works, making it climb further upon his framework.

He saw the goat starting to sniff on his leg and take a step against him. "No, stay," Mirage said, and the goat listened and stopped only too look at him again before bleated a horrible sound.

"Stay," he mumbled, " good goat, now back down," he slowly raised his arm to try and push the creature off him, carefully, of course.

It was at that moment, Katja walked in on them, and she stopped dead in her tracks and opened her mouth in surprise. Oh, how she wished she had a camera to capture the moment. But then again, she had been playing with her new phone her father had given her, and that had a camera on it. Mirage looked over at her and put on something that could only be described as a displeased expression.

"Why are you only standing there? Get it off me," he scowled at her, and Katja grinned as she raised the phone and took a few pictures of them before she chuckled and put it back in her back pocket.

"Katja..."

"Alright, Alright, don't get you rear in a knot," she hummed as she walked forward "that is enough Blue, jump down," she said, waving at the goat that gladly jumped down from the cybertronian's frame and leaped out from the barn.

"I thought that you had them restricted," he grumbled as he followed the goat with a suspicious look in his eye.

"The goats? Good luck with that. They are like the animal version of Houdini; they can escape anything if they want" She closed the pen that had been left open since that morning

"I liked them better when they were scared of me," he tried to brush away the dirt the creature had drawn on him and only made it all worse. He heaved a sight. Frag this planet and its organic matter.

"You could have waved him down easily on your own, goats love to climb heights and other things, especially the younger ones," she said, setting down the wheelbarrow with the animals' supper closer to the feeding chamber.

He hummed lightly in response. "Didn't want to hurt it" he looked over his arms at the burn marks and the dried up energon that began to itch and irritate him now when he could move more. It had been a few days now since he woke up and had found the small human standing in the doorway. After most of his healing system had taken care of the worst thing, he could shut down the damaged programs. There was still a lot that wasn't right, but at least he was out of the red zone, at least. And he didn't want to admit it, but the little femme had been a welcome distraction throughout the days. Especially when it came as a distraction and with information, and he had to admit that humankind both fascinated and disgusted him.

Katja looked up at him and suddenly smiled as an idea hit her "Do you think that you can walk outside today?" He had been able to move more and more of his body parts, and last night spoke about started to stretch.

He gave her a nod, and her smile grew "good! Then come," she said and walked towards the big door.

"why?"

"Just come, you'll like it, and it is a good exercise for today" she urged him

Mirage looked at her a little hesitantly, not because he didn't want to stretch his legs. His body demanded that he now started to move before he could be climbing the walls in pure boredom. And he was pretty sure that the walls wouldn't hold his weight. But the other humans that lived on this property was a huge problem.

"what of your creator?"

"My creator? Oh, you mean my Dad? He is at a new work interview and is not home at the moment; come on, I promise you will appreciate it," she said and walked around the barn where she knew they had the long water hose and without looking at him then she sat on the water. The tube she hadn't care to hang up again had been out in the late summer sun, thus heating some of the clear liquid.

She felt the heavy vibrations in the ground as Mirage stepped clumsily of the opening and walked a little shaky towards her. It must have been tight for him to sit on the hard floor with not so much leg space, so it could not be helped that he was like a newborn fawn.

she turned around with the hose and looked up at him, and damn he was huge! his head was slightly over the roof of the barn as he gently ( as a gigantic cybetronian could) was holing one arm as a stabilization on its side " it is time to rise out that grime of you "

He gave her a curious expression and then nodded. If it was similar to an oil bath, then he probably needed it badly. And he wasn't ready to say no when she offered to do it for him.

Katja smiled happily that he agreed, she had thought about offering him a laundry earlier this week, but he still didn't seem to be okay. Then she had wondered if he could transform into a cool car like the others seemed to be able to do. But she pushed that idea away; of course, he was still too injured for it.

But before she dived right in on her new mission, It was probably best to lose a few clothes, because this looked like a full-time body job. Katja started to pull off her thick sweater and put it down on a safe, dry place and pulled back her hair so she could put it in a high ponytail. She even took off her shoes and socks and rolled up the jeans the best he could. The ground beneath her feet was still warm from a day full of sun, and the air was warm enough to work with water. Katja began to fiddle with the hose so that she got the right nozzle on as Mirage continued to glanced over at her with his curiosity and still slightly suspicion over what this... water substance could do to him.

But as he was looking at what she was doing, something ells caught his attention, and he zoomed in on to the small body of the femme that before had been hiding under thick clothes. First, he was surprised that anyone could be so light-skinned, but as his gaze traveled over her, he started to notice a lot of discolored spots and red marks that adorned her whole body. He had never seen anything like it before, but then she was the only real person he had encountered so far. But somehow the marks felt .... wrong to him. Without really thinking about it, he bent down slightly and with a finger, carefully touched her back, causing Katja to fast as lightning flinch away from his finger and stared upon him with shock written on her face.

" These marks..." he asked slowly, "What is the meaning of them?" maybe it was a human culture thing? Perhaps it was, but in the data package, he had gone no other human had this discoloration on them.

He could see a shrugged went through her body, and as he still was zoomed in on her body, he took notice that some of the small hair that covered her arms stood up, and suddenly she relied away from him again, and his optics was on her face yet again. Her expression was...pained, was she in pain? He could swear that he did not touch her so hard.

" its....nothing," she answered quickly, too quickly, and he tilted his helm slightly as warning bell started ringing in his processor like red marking, something wasn't quite right with this.

"That doesn't look like nothing," he replied with a now soft tone, staring down at the young girl who was now trying to hide her body by turning away from him. But that only made it worse as her shoulder blades were worse than her front. And by her action and tense body languish, she was on edge to run away from him. The thought made him pull back slightly, the last thing he wanted was to corner her, and he nodded.

Mirage got up entirely and let the femme collect her gathering before he saw her take a deep breath. She did not run away, and he saw that as he had made the right decision to back away—her grasp on the water hose hardened before it relaxed again.

"Just drop it, Mirage, " she asked with a thick voice. Something was wrong, and he was going to find out what, but not right now for he had a feeling if he did, then she would run away from him, so he nodded slowly.

The tingling feelings crept under her skin, and she had to try really hard to not tearing into her skin only to make it stop. Katja looked at her sweater, and for a moment, she debated with herself whether to put it back on or not. But his question had been a legit one and he didn't know what it was. She nibbled on her lower lip. Screw this, she turned around and started to walked tower him.

"Alright, let's do this" she reached up to just slightly below his knee, and it fit her well because she decided to rinse them off first as the first jet of water hit him as he jerked a little when it created a tickling sensation.

Soon dirt and soot fell from him and she let the water penetrate among the thousands of cables that held everything together and it started to feel like a massage session. In the places where it was difficult for her to flush out alone, she used her fingers and dug out small stones, twigs, and other things that she didn't even dare to ask what it was or how it had been put there in the first place.

Mirage had sat down slowly when the strength left his already sore legs, and it was also so that she could easily access the more difficult places of his frame. At one point, he let the little femme stand in his hand so she could quickly rinse off his neck region, and she was working on it with no stop. He off-lined his optics for a moment, and a low purring sound came from him. Katja grinned as she looked up at the huge cybertronian that now was utterly relaxed and almost acted just like a big cat.

"I take it that you like it?" she asked him and got a humming sound like answer, "good."

Everything with the cybetronian body fascinated her as he was such a complicated mystery; how did they even move around? They have to weigh like two-tone or something. He bent his neck a little bit more to the side so that she could get better access. One of the cables was very hot and felt almost vibrant and was covered under some of the smaller more lukewarm ones. She looked up at his face when she suddenly understood that this was one of the main energon leads he told her about. But that also meant that if she wanted (which she doesn't) she could easily hurt him seriously, even kill him if she did something with this specific lead.

But instead of feeling troubled by the thought, she was filled with a strange warm feeling by the motion. Either Mirage didn't think that she wasn't a threat, or he had started to trust her and after didn't care that one of his most vital lines laid exposed in front of her. Katja sincerely hoped it was the last mention that mattered because she actually liked the pompous cybetronian. She felt very humbled by his display of trust and continued to wash him with a new determination.

She dogged a little further into his chest cables and got hold of the branch that was stuck in there. "Did you crash-land in the thickest part forest or something?" she asked, "you are full of scrap and branches."

"Or something," he said as he online his optics to look at her "Not my choice of a landing place, but I was shot at by a Decepticon, so my route was altered"

"I say" She turned off the horse and looked at him; she could see so many small weld marks and deep notches in his armor. But his color had matted some and she was overall satisfied with her work. "So big guy, only your backside left."

He online his optics again and nodded as he slowly put her down on the ground again so he could get up with a little trouble, and she rinsed off his back. When they were ready, Katja hung the hose back where it belonged as Mirage stretched up his body in the air, which felt much better than before.

Suddenly a distant sound of a car caught their attention. Katja stepped aside to let the big Autobot get back in and she glanced at the dust cloud around the fast driving car that was on its way tower them, which indicated that her father was back. She waved to Mirage and jogged up the porch and into the house and to the kitchen as she started to act as it was there she had been all day.

She heard how the car door slam shut and looked out the window as she tried to see what mood her father was in. Her heart was racing fast and her hands felt slippery if it was from the water or sweat she did not know. But as she saw her father walk up, she could see that it was going to one of thus good days. Please be a good one.


	4. Chapter 4

It turned out that her dad indeed was in a good mood this evening. The job interview had gone well, but he did not know if he got the job or not yet. They would contact him in a few days maybe a week but he was almost guaranteed the position. As to celebrate the good news, he had been grocery shopping, so this evening became something of a feast. He had even bought her a bag of her favorite candy for later. Chewy and sweet. The best kind there is, and she could not wait to pop one in her mouth and thoroughly enjoyed it.

After dinner, her father took a beer and went to the TV for some sports program or perhaps the news. Katja looked over her shoulder when he walked out and started to put away the rest and wipe off the counter last, as she did that she was looking thoughtfully out the window. Mirage was getting better, and today confirmed that he indeed was starting to recover, soon he would be fit for fight again. So to speak. And he would go off on his own and meat up with the other Autobots.

She stopped in her movement as a cold feeling slip into her chest, Because that also meant that he would leave her. Her hand on the fabric tightened, and she closed her eyes as dizziness comes over her, and she grimaced and bent forward not to fall.

_Breath in... Breath out...It's alright... breathe..._ She could hear TV's loud voices and her heart pulsing so loudly that it was ringing in her ears. He would soon be gone; he would leave her here, but it was as it should be. But why did the mere thought hurt so much? She did not know him so well; the only thing she had done was to save his life. So why did it felt like she was losing someone close to her?

Tears were gathering in her eyes as she crunched down but held on to the counter; it hurt so much. But perhaps it was for the best. She had no right to hold him there because he made her feel...safe. They had a war to fight, and she had no place in it.

Katja slowly straightened herself and let a ragging breath leave her tight thought; she put her hand down in the now cold and dirty dishwater before pulling up the last plate. She knew this was going to happen sooner or later. But it really scared her how quickly she got used to having the big giant in the barn. He hadn't been there for more than a few weeks, and he had already settled into her everyday life. It was like he always had been there. Katja quickly shook her head to get rid of the thoughts; she could not think like that. Nothing good would come of it.

But all good things have an end. Katja closed her eyes again and took a last deep soothing breath and put the plate back to its place. She pulled out the plug in the sink and went to the office, it was there they had their old computer from the - 90 was sitting.

She had to distract her with something, but then again, what she was going to do doing was only speeding up his departure. She began to look up various pages containing information about the Autobots whereabouts. Many people were speculating on where base they were on was. What she could understand was that people knew that there _was one_ , but not where it was. Some people reported that the Autobots had kidnapped them and forced them to stay on a secret base experimenting on them. Others claimed that they were their best buddies and had them on speed dials. Some news talked about how dangerous it was to have aliens in their backyard, and they took even the smallest case against them as something huge they could use to discriminate the Autobots.

Katja tried to avoid all of these theories, but she wrote down where the news was from and when, as a few different areas were a good possibility for the location. On her note was everything from Chicago to Washington, as well as Ohio and Mexico. She continued for a while before her eyes began to burn, and she had to shut down the computer.

What she suspected, given how many activists or so-called 'situations' people boasted that they had seen an Autobot, Washington was the most likely city where they were in. She took the note and folded it down so that she could put it in her pocket for later use and erased every history on the computer so that her father would not see what she had been working on.

"I'm going out to the animals, will probably be out for a good while," she said in the hallways and just got a loud hum in response as she stepped out into the now cooler night.

It felt strange how the temperature could change so quickly here, but she blamed it on the mountains. Katja hid her arms in the big sweater's front pocket and went out to the barn. She could hear the soothing sounds of the animals eating in their boxes as soon as she entered and looked over Mirage that was sitting and resting.

His eyes were dark as he was in recharge, but she could hear soft clicking sounds coming from his frame that softened her nerves that he still was alive. But considering he didn't even wake up when she walked in said he was still very much affected by his injuries. So instead of disturbing him, she began preparing tomorrow's food portions for the goats and the sheep while she began to hum at an old song her mother always sang to her when she was younger. Singing was still something she did when she worked in the barn or cleaned for the animals. So there was no strange thing as she started to sing for herself in a low humming voice.

_~ You are everything I ever wanted,  
You are everything I ever dreamed,   
You are the one that makes me remember  
all the dreams I have forgotten.~_

She picked up one of the smaller tools and began to brush the goats that had some strange seed capsules in their pelt, surly from the field. She continued to sing the song for a bit until she came to a part where she remembers her mother always switched to her native language, so she did that too only to honor her memory of the melody.   
  
_~För du är allt jag någonsin önskat.  
Du är allt jag någonsin drömt.   
Du är den som får mig att minnas  
alla drömmar jag har glömt ~_

She smiled at the goats who buried his head in her stomach, demanded that she would continue to pat them, so she did with a smile on her lips.

~Du är den som får mig hoppas  
Du är den som får mig att le  
All min kärlek får du bära  
All min kärlek vill jag ge~

Katja bowed down and hugger the goat before going out of their box and continue to hum the last sequence of the song while she checked them all. She folded up some of the used plaids and suddenly felt observed, something she had started to develop a six sense about. She smiled as she looked over her shoulder and was met by a pair of blue eyes that followed her every move.

"I hope I didn't wake you," she said, drying off her hands and sat down on the haystack.

Mirage looked down at her " You didn't, I woke up before you started to sing. You have a lovely voice," he said with a -what she could only call- charming smile on his lip plates. "However, I do not recognize the last language you sang last in. What was it?"

"Swedish, from my mother's side of the family. She moved here when she was my age but always kept in touch with people over there. It was also thanks to her that I can some, but frankly, it is quite difficult to pronounce so many of the strange words."

"Really? In what sense?" he asked curiously as he could not phantom how it could be any different from English.

"Swedish grammar is difficult because it does not make sense. The same words can mean three different things and so they constantly find new words that are not even translatable, not even to mention that they can write the letter one way and then pronounced it differently," she said, waved with her arms. "I mean, seriously! Who does that? And as they speak, it sounds it as if they are singing even if they not actually doing it."

Mirage laughed. " It sounds like fun."

She huffed " Easily for a super-advanced life form to say, you can just download the language and then *poff* you can speak it fluently" she enhanced the 'poff' part with her hands and Mirage shook his helm in amusement

"True," he admitted, he never had to think of it anyway. It was more of how much space the data of the languish took "I must say that the Italian language appeals to me so much more than the English one."

"Nooo, really?" she sarcastically asked, "And here I thought you were only using the dialect for fun."

"Cheeky femme," he poked her lightly in the stomach, but only the slight movement caused her to move away and make a fast grimace before she fast enough smoothed out her expression. Something that did not go unnoticed to him.

He didn't say anything at first but withdrew his hand and inspected her, was she afraid of him? " I didn't mean to scare you," he said after a moment's silence " I hope that you know that. I don't want to hurt you."

"No! No! No, don't think you scare me," she hurried to say and looked up at him with wide eyes "it's just that ...." she was lost for words and sighted.

"I'm not so good with touching," at least not the more friendly kind, but it was nothing she said out loud in any case. However, it felt different when she touched him; it was not the same as a human being would. She had even been able to stand in his hand and wash him before.

"why is that?" he asked, and the question was innocent, but the meaning was even more substantial.

"Let's say I don't have that good experience of it," she replied, "But your touch isn't ... so bad, you just surprised me right now, sorry."

Mirage tilted his head briefly before putting his hand down with his palm, now making it her choice. Katja looked down at the invitation he had given her and only hesitated for a moment before cautiously walked over to his hand. With a slow and gentle movement, he lifted her so that he could put her down on the largest part of his knee. When she was like this, she also comes up to a better height, meaning she didn't have to bend her neck so much to look at him.

"Is this all right?" he asked, and she nodded with a smile

"So, tell me more about Cybertron," Katja asked as she sat down with her legs crossed and her hands resting in them as Mirage began to tell the most fascinating and painting stories about his home planet. That night was the first night she had fallen asleep with him, his hand over her like shelter, and she had probably never slept so well in her entire life.

~*--*~

The days flew by, and soon a whole month had passed by since Mirage had come to her on that stormy night. Katja stretched and hummed contentedly, in the living room a fire crackled as it had become a little chilly outside. Her dad had been in a relatively good mood lately. The bruises had almost wholly disappeared, and things seemed to be looking brighter. But this day her father had been glued to the TV and ignored her, not even speaking to her or shouting for her to get him a beer. Which was nice for a change.

Katja turned off the computer and went out to the kitchen to grab a glass of water while humming a low tune. She had talked to Mirage about her last searches, and he too agreed that Washington sounded like the best place to start. The problem was that it was far away, and they had talked if she might come along.

And yes, it was something that she wanted to do. But then again, she didn't think it would be a good idea, her father would never let her and if he knew where she was going and with who. He would surely do something that would not benefit any of them and bow a gasket or two. And she didn't want to be the reason that more shit was thrown at the friendly cybetronian. She was only going to be in the way, and as long as her father stayed in a good mood, his darker side would not come out.

Katja looked over her shoulder as the silence fell completely over the house again and she put the glass down in the sink. This was strange; not even the TV was on. She turned around to look if something happened but froze in her movements as she saw her dad standing in the doorway. Blocking it completely, his head was bowing down, and she could see the large veins in his neck pulse as he stood there.

Katja looked out the window before she looked up at her father again, "Dad?" she asked in a low voice, please don't be back. Please, don't let it be this time again; things just had started to look brighter. Like they could put everything behind them and be a family again.

His red-eyed eyes stared coldly into her as he walked forward slowly, like a predator in position to kill and there was something in his face that made her whole inside turn cold as fear took hold of her as he spoke in an icy voice.

"What.....are you planning?"

Oh shit...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:  
> The song is a Swedish called "you are everything" or " du är allt", you can find it here with an English translation. 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MX71A_QN6sE&list=RDMX71A_QN6sE&start_radio=1
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

oh shit ... oh shit, this wasn't good at all, Katja tried her hand behind her to find something she could protect herself with."I don't know what you mean; you have to be more specific," she said and took a step back but came nowhere as the bench was behind her and he blocked the only exit.

"Don't play dumb, you little bitch," he exclaimed as his fist hit the wall hard so that the paintings hanging there fell to the floor and the glass shatters in thousand bits."You planing to run away, aren't you? I have seen where you want to go. Washington, is it?"

Katja shrugged and held the glass she had been drinking just a moment earlier and quickly shook her head "No, It's schoolwork, nothing else" how had he come to this? She had been so careful to delete all search history.

He gave out a toneless laugh and shook his head "Your little bitch, I know everything you are planning, and you dare stand here and lie to me?" he hisses and slowly walking towards her. The broken glass shards were crushed under his shoes as he did and Katja's eyes darted around for an escape route.

She took the glass and threw it as hard as she could only towards him, and at the same time, she took charge and ran around him. something he hadn't been prepared for

**~*--*~ Warning... graphic abuse... Harsh languish...Warning~*--*~**

He quickly turned around, "came back here, "he bellowed as he managed to get hold of her hair and tore it hard backward. Successfully he managed to get a grip on her, and she let out a howl of pain.

Katja tried to get a hold of his hand and tried to loosen his grip, but he hit her with his free hand and dragged her out into the living room. As he was at least double her size and a lot stronger, she had not much to say about it.

"You are not going anywhere you ungrateful worthless piece of shit" He tossed her on the floor and swung a blow to her head.

"I give you food," another punch landed on her soft body, making her whimper in pain. "I give you a roof over your head" he pulled her in the leg towards the fireplace. "I even let you keep thus damn animals of yours, and this is how you thank me? by planning to run away?"

"N..no!" she whimpered, but he kicked her in the stomach and the air went out of her lung. She tried to gasp for the air that did not want to come down. "Please...dad..." she begged

"Shut up!" he demanded, She choked on all sound that could translate into any screams, that would only make him more furious. He hated it when she talked back to him or made any sound.

"You are mine, do not think that you are allowed to leave on your own, freak?" for a moment, he left her on the cold, dirty floor. She could hear him drink something and then thrown the bottle at her, hitting her square in the head. Making her whimper as she tried to roll into a protective ball. It felt like she was breathing fire, and it felt like her head would explode any moment now.

She had to get out of here; he was out of control. This was worse than he ever had been. Katja tried to raise her head only for a flash of pain shot through her neck. Her field of vision was blurred but she could see the shape of how he was doing something in the fire. She lay down on her stomach a little more and pressed her hands down to the ground but the force abandoned her, and she fell apart.

 _Nonono, move, you have to move_ , she tried to get up again and felt how something hot tickled her face making her stomached cringle as the smell of blood hit her. The dizziness increased, and she gasped for breath. She heard his heavy shoes against the floor and looked up at him. He was holding one of the old branding tools.

"no, please, No!" she cried out and, with the new terror, forced herself up only to fall again as her leg hurt as someone had stabbed it, they would not work!

"Please....nu... please, dad," she begged as she now desperately crawled away from him. Her throat was so sore that she could barely talk, it hurt like she had been swallowing nails or something, but her father didn't stop. She could see the red-hot tip glow like Decepticons blood-red optics, and it was a frightening contrast to the darkness that was around them. She managed to get up on her legs yet again as but collapsed halfway and felt a hard knee dig into her spine.

A low screaming came out of her as she tried to pull away from him and the red hot metal. She tried to say anything, she decided to think of a way to get out of there but the only thing she came up with was a name, and she did not hesitate to scream his name at this moment.

"Mirage!"

she screamed as loud as she could, throat ached, and it felt as if the heart would tear out her chest. Her father turned her around harshly as she continued to scream and tried to push him away with her arms, and he took a hard hold of her neck. His hand was so large that his fingers were almost completely closed around her neck as he was squeezing it so hard that her screams died out before they even could leave her vocals

But that was the least of her problems as the suddenly burning pain shot through her chest where he had put down the branding tool.

She howls out in pain as he leaned over her, pushing her much smaller body down into the cold hard floor as the air smelled of burnt hair and flesh as he pressed the tool even deeper down in her muscle.

She could not think there was nothing in her mind as the pain canceled everything and for a moment, her world went blissfully black and silent, like she was thrown into nothing. But it didn't last and as she came to it, the pain made her scream, and spasm went through her whole body that now was free from her torturer.

~*--*~ safe again, only the aftermath, mentioned of abuse in the text below ~*--*~

JCR. John Clark Ranch, it had been her grandparent's old burning tool and also her father's name.

John, she hated him, she hated what he was doing, she hated that she was soo weak and that he now had branded his name on her. It was all her fault; she was not worthy of being saved; she wanted to let it all go, forgetting everything and give up.

Seconds ticked by, at least she thought it did because the only thing she could focus on was the pulsing pain that had ebbed slightly now, but it was still there. The cold floor chilled her body but in the right way as she was overheating. Her head was spinning, and the taste of blood made her sick, she tried to move but her body didn't want to listen. From somewhere far away, she could hear a loud vibrating roar in pure anger, but she could not recognize it.

Her breathing was turning irregular and tears flowed freely down her cheeks as she now could get air into her lung, and it burned, the burning was everything she was feeling. It felt like the whole world was rocking and spinning around somewhere she could hear her name being said somewhere far away. She could no longer hold it down as she turned to her side and heaved out the content of her stomach.

And she welcomed the darkness that enveloped her.

~*--*~

Katja slowly came back to the world of the living, it had to be because everything hurt like hell, and she would hope that in heaven, there was no pain.

She blinked a little tower the dim light, her vision was still not right, but she could hear a familiar voice speak to her. Filling her with a sense of safety which she did not think was possible anymore. She listens to his voice as she realized that it was Mirage that spoke. She could felt the vibrations in his chest before she could register the words he was pronouncing.

The constant humming from his spark lulled her back into an in-between state as she leaned her forehead against the hot metal, soaking it all in. A large finger gently began to stroke her hair, deliberately avoiding the new wounds on the side of it.

"Katya?" She slowly turned her head up at the sound and could now focus on two worried optics of her guardian.

Hon nodded as she did not trust her voice to work correctly for the moment; she began to move her fingers and then arms more. She was alive, and it was all thanks to him.

Mirage felt how raw anger caused throw his frame and made him shake in pure rage. He had tried to press it down to be there when she finally had woken up. But as soon as she was looking at him, he could see how...dead she looked inside like the very last thing had been taken from her. And again for a thousand times this hour alone; he wished he had killed that awful monster of a man. But unfortunately, he was still alive, still unconscious and beaten, but alive ... for now.

He would kill him; he would squeeze the living life out of the horrible monster that even dared to call himself her creator. Because there was no other punishment that suited him better than feel the life gets ripped away from him. Optimus would agree with him such people did not deserve to live. And the worst of it, he had hurt his charge!. Mirage suddenly felt the small human move around in his hand and focused on her.

"don't move too much," what should he do? Frag it, if he only could contact Ratchet. The medic would know what to do.

"I'm okay," Katja mumbled and he looked down to the small and frail woman in his hand. Never in his whole existence had he been holding such fragile little thing. It was like she was made of the thinnest glass and would break if he even looked at her too hard. Her skin was now almost transparent and shimmered with a cold sweat. He could still see the blood on her chest where the monster had branded her.

"You're not okay," he said with a tick voice, the tone was so dark and icy that it almost frightened himself, never had he been feeling this kind of emotion before. And that was saying something as he had lost both family and friends in this war.

The little female leaned her head against his chassis again, just above his spark, and he felt it strike an extra blow to his already raging emotions. He could feel how small shakes begun to travel through her body as the chock and adrenalin probably was leaving her physique.

"Is he...." her voice was broken and cracked.

"unfortunately alive," he answered and had to keep from hugging her harder against him, he felt how all his programs were going high wire and most of his protective programs were running.

"Good," whispered Katja.

"Good?" he looked down at her and growled, all traces of his dialect were as good as gone "How can _that_ be a good thing? I should have killed him, crushed the pitiful invertebrate example of a man"

Katja raised her hand and laid it against the pulsating surface of his spark as she looked tired into it as she swallowed again, making her cringe as she shook her head only an inch. "No, Autobots are... no killers"

Mirage lifted her higher up so that she now was at eye level with him "We are no saints, I'm not, even we can make mistakes..and a man like him, nobody would miss..."

Katja smiled weakly, and the sight of it made his spark pulse painfully, she raised her hand and carefully stroke it against his much bigger cheek "please? He is .... still my dad."

"No monster that knowingly hurts their offspring should be called a creator" Mirage stared down at her and felt the warm little hand against his cheek and he tried to concentrate only on it. He had to because in this moment, she was the only thing that grounded him.

That made everything worth fighting for. Mirage vented out a warm stream of air over her before leaning his head against her so much smaller. For now, he would not kill the man, but he could not push away the fear that gripped his spark that he was making a huge mistake by letting him live.

"Thank...you," she murmured lowly and if he had been farther away from her, he would surely have missed it. "For caring," He hugged her soft body at the words. He closed his eyes as he felt her hand fall from his cheek and if he had not heard her breathing and the steady heartbeat, he would have been terrified. Mirage sat for a moment before slowly moving his hand toward his chest and keeping her hidden from the hate full world all around them. He suddenly understood where her brushes came from, her reaction to touch. The abuse had been going on for a while now; it had too because she was to calm. Like she knew how to came back from it all like it was another day for her.

He forced himself to only concentrate on her heartbeat to try and calm down; he had to think this through. Because what could he do? Some part of his spark wanted to stay there with her, protecting her from everything that wanted her hurt, and most protecting her from her father. He wanted to protect her and watch her grow into a beautiful woman who would take the world by storm. Mirage looked up and stared at the landscape that lay outside the barn. He was more or less healed now as it was, and if he had wanted to, he would be able to leave tomorrow.

However much he wanted the war to end and hide there and play on his ignorance; but he could not hide from the truth that his comrades still needed him. Decepticons were on this planet and as long as they were still active, there was no guarantee of any living being. He had the ability to fight with them; he could protect what he now wanted to protect. Without thinking about it, one of his fingers began to gently stroke the white hair of his young charge.

What would happen if she followed him? She would be at the center of danger; she would be at the center of the war zone. The thought made his mind turn in discomfort. He didn't want her there. There it would be all the more dangerous. But he couldn't leave her here with that .... monster. He sat deep in his thoughts as he watched the sunset that he almost missed how his charge was waking up again after a far too short rest. He felt her move as she sat up and he let his gaze now rest on her.

"You can't stay here "The words she uttered froze him in place before he vented out again,

"No"

"When are you leaving?"He stared down at the fragile body that was in his palm and almost felt a new dagger dug into his spark. Was she seriously talking about this now? When her father had done....all of that horrible things to her. How could she act like this was just another day?. He couldn't find the right words to answer her, were there even right words for this, but instead of answering her question, he contrasted it with one of his own.

"come with me."

Katja looked up at him, and her eyes were wide and filled with pain and unshed tears. A small spark of hope lit up in her amber eyes before it disappeared again, and she faded away as she looked away "I can't..... my dad would never allow it."

"Frag him" the cybetronian growled, " He will only hurt you more, how can you want to stay here? I will not give you any choice in the matter Katja, you going with me and that is final!"

Katja bowed her head and felt a warm feeling spread through her at his words. She wanted to say yes, get me the hell out of here, save me! But she could not. She would only put more trouble on the Autobots, on him. And that was the last thing she ever wanted to do.

"Probably, but always after had doing something this bad he back of for a time," she whispered, he would surely do it again, and again, and until one day he would go too far and kill her. Or if she was still alive by then, moved out of her own the day she was eight-teen.

"He still has the custody of me" Mirage held up her other hand and cupped it underneath his other while she sat in

"Either you follow me with your own free will or I will force you," he repeats, there was nothing else to do. She was safer with him, war or no war, he would protect her and Optimus would understand. He was sure that his leader would support his decision because she would not stay here.

Karja felt the tears threatening to come back but now for a completely different reason. "It would be kidnapping and given what it looks like for Autobots right now, you are already on a sensitive ground when it comes to the people." She had seen it on TV, especially with that extra clean-up group that the military created and so many demonstrations and discussions were already held if they needed the Autobots to stay on earth.

"I refuse to be another blow to your people; I'm not that important."

"You are to me, "he said and leaned over his head and stared up at the old roof, trying to calm down, his thoughts turned to the top and he felt there might be another way.

Maybe he could bring her, not give her a choice? She would surely calm down enough time and see that it was all for her safety. But was she safe there? If he only brought her, the most substantial risk was that they would give the media and politicians extra bait. And given that they were stuck here on this planet, they depended on the generosity of people.

"If we do it on your people's way? This must be against the law of yours," he then asked as the idea hit him. She tilted her head slightly to one side and examined him questioningly.

"If we tell you... government what happens so they can't ignore it, and given the fact that you know me, I'm sure you'll somehow be in contact with us," he said, smiling suddenly. It was not a bad idea; it was brilliant, and it could work.

He saw a flash of fear wander across her face and then she ponder on his words. Katja stared down at the hot and rough surface she was sitting on, letting one of her hands track the patterns on it. What if she could continue to spend time with him? The truth was that she was terrified of what would happen if he disappeared and her father woke up, in such a short time her whole world had changed and was now centered around him.

Then it was decided, Katja nodded to him "okay" her heart suddenly beat an extra beat as she made up her mind and she even gave him a small smile. "But, I do believe that it has to be the government that works with you. It would go faster that way I believe," she said and felt the hope started to blossom in her chest as if the light in the tunnel was getting stronger. This could work!

Mirage gave off a low rattling sound, as he brought her closer to him and nodded. This was a good plan; the only problem was that he had to leave her. But if he could tell Optimus everything and at the same time recognize them that he had created a guardian bond with her. Because he had figured it out after that horrible experience that it was indeed there, that would spin the whole thing faster as a guardian bond was something their race valued highly.

They sat there for a while and was just as happy with each other's company as he slowly was stroking her back. Sometime during his musing, Katja had fallen asleep and Mirage held his hand over her, creating a sheltered and warm cocoon while holding her comfortably in his lap.

His little human charge. That was a strange thought, but he needed to leave as quickly as he could to return to her. It was maybe a 10-hour drive from here to Washington at an average speed. Luckily he was no ordinary car so he could do it in at least half the time.

But he would need a new car model and the mere thought of having to scan the old scrap pile they called a car made him cringle in horror, but he probably only needed to do so until he found something better and faster. Mirage looked down at his clenched hand and could feel the soft movements her body made as she dreamed.

Soon she would be safe with them, and he would get her out of here.


	6. Chapter 6

~*--*~`Epilogue´~*--*~

It took Katja two more days to recover somewhat. Mirage had been over here as a mother hen, not letting her out of his sight and hovering around her. It was kind of cute. The young girl looked up at her guardian as she remembers how he had brought out his sword and threatening her so-called father into silence and he does remember that he told him some well-spoken ( but threatening) words to not even lay a finger on Katja's hair or he would find himself feeding the fishes.

It had been glorious! John had backed away and only glaring at them at a distance, even if she was in the house, he was not in the same room as her and she was positive that he would stay that way even after Mirage would leave.

And that way was now. Katja laid a hand over the red mark and held back a winch. She hated that they had to be separated, but it was for the best in this situation. But what if he could not make it? What if he didn't find them. Or worse, they didn't listen to him?. The fear of being left there all alone swooped over her, and she quickly turned her attention to the large transformer that was eyeing their old rusty car.

"This is so not going to be fun," he said as he used one of his pedes and pushed the old car that gave out a complaining sound. "Not fn at all."

"Don't complain, we don't have anything ells" Katja said as he looked uncomfortable at the thought of scanning it, but the sooner he got this out of his system and went away, the sooner he could get back.

"Yeah, yeah," he activated his scanner, and a blue light swooped over it. As soon as he had all the data, his frame started to shift and folder down. Soon there stood two identical cars parked in front of her.

"wow," she e circulated him and touched the hood of the car, it was solid "This is so cool."

Mirage laughed low, "What don't I do for a lovely lady as yourself," he joked " It is not what I would have chosen for myself, but it is enough right now."

Katja eyed his new care body with interest "If you had to choose what would you be?" she asked him as she felt how small vibration was caressing through his frame

"Something slimmer and faster," he hummed as he tried the brakes, rusty, but then again, the car model was old.

"Why am I not surprised?" she grinned and suddenly felt that someone was looking at her, and she glances up at the house where one of the curtains softly moved.

"I will come back as soon as I can, and I promise you I will take you here from next time," he told her as he scanned the house, the creator was on the top floor.

Tears glittered in her eyes but did not fall as she leaned forward and gave the hot metal a light kiss and rested her head at it "My knight in shining armor" she smiled sadly and then took a deep breath and straightened up "I will wait for your return."

"Katya ...."

She shook her head, "It's okay. You will soon be back, and my dad is just too scared of you to even dare to do something right now. "That was true. Katja put on the bravest and confident smile she could muster at the moment, "So drive like the devil is on your tailpipe, alright?"

Despite the situation, he gave away a rattling laugh, and Katja must have imagined it, but the car bowed down a bit and then back up almost like a nod. She backed away as Mirage seemed to hesitate for a moment before she tried to wave him away, and he mentally slapped himself before he backed off.

"Next time we see you, I will take you from here, and that is a promise," he said loudly to her before he put in another gear and drove out from the start. When his tires got better ground, he increased his speed. Ignored all speed laws. he had a mission, and not even human enforcement could stop him

"And an Autobot always keep what he promises," She said as she watched her guardian drive away from her with a sinking heart.

~*--*~`A few days later´~*--*~

Mirage was driving as fast as he could on the old and dirty road. The nervousness crept throughout his body as he steered himself into the driveway of the farm. It felt like an eternity since he left it, but it had been slightly over five days. They had been right that the Autobots had an active base in Washington and that they were working with a lot of humans. Some were kind....others not so much.

He had told them everything that had happened, and Optimus and the others had wanted to go and pick up the girl right away, but the humans didn't allow it. At that time, it had taken both Sideswipe and Ironhide to keep him in place as his rage had blinded him for a second. This new and raw guardian bond had both its right sides but also an unfortunate side effect. And he was anxious for his small charge. After Optimus talked to the humans in charge and Ratchet had put him together, he and Ironhide had left with a legal document to take temporary custody of Katja and put her into the protection program.

He felt the pulse of energy travel through his sleek red frame; he was no longer the rusty scrap heap of car that he had scanned. No, he had fined a Ferrari 458 Italia. Not only that, Ratchet had updated him with a new program that, in a situation like this, would make talking to humans so much easier. An Holloform, where they could separate a piece of their being to a substantial and working human form.

Mirage sat in the driveway for a second. He had been sure that someone would come out and great him. But when no one came out, he scanned the whole house for a life form; the rusty old car was still on the driveway, so the bastard was still there. And it was also the only life form that was inside the house. He could feel how a cold feeling started to spread inside of him like a virus; he scanned the barn and came up with nothing there either.

Where was she?

Ironhide and his charge were on their way with three other people, but they had been to slow for his liking.

 **:: Hide, something is not right, she isn't here::** he said over the come-link, and he activated his holloform and got out of the car.

 **:: Dino stay where you are, do not do anything::** Ironhide's human charge said, it was funny that the massive war hared weapon specialist would find his charge here too, perhaps was not humans and cybetronian so different after all?

Mirage didn't even care to replay because he would not sit there and wait; he had to find Katja as fast as he could. He could see the temporary repairs on the wall where he had broken through to rescue her from the abuse.

 **:: Dino, don't do anything stupid::** Ironhide said, and the spy completely ignored him. He took the stairs in a step and knocked hard on the door. He tried to scan the house again, but the only thing that came back was her father's signature.

The door was suddenly opened by the very man he had come to hate, and his blue eyes fixed on the larger male. "Where is Katja?" he asked, no need to beat around the bushes here.

"Who are you?" John asked as he glared at the intruder and then looked out to the expensive care that he had been driving, eying it with some kind of suspicion. But then a light of recognition was lit in his dark brown eyes. "It's you" he hissed and opened up the door completely

"It's me, where is she?" Mirage asked as he fisted his hands together; the drive to kill was still there, and it would be so easy. A hit in his throat and split that fraggers' main artery in the blink of the eye.

"So you haven't heard?" the father suddenly asked, leaning against the door frame and looked at him with a suddenly smug expression. "She's gone"

" know where I can find her?" Mirage asked, his patient wearing ever thinner as the seconds passed.

The father gave out a hazy, toneless laugh, "Are you kidding me?" He asked, straightening up now as he finds new courage as his eyes fixed on the young Italian man before him as he spoke:

"She is gone, kicked the bucked, thrown in the blanket, is six feet under."

The sound of Ironhide driving up behind him and several doors opening and closes were ignored as Mirage stared at the horrible human in chock. And for a second, his holloform flicked out.

He growled as he lost control over his emotion; his hand shot forward and gripped the human's thick throat.

"Mirage! stand down!" Ironhide shouted, but the spy saw literary red, and he heard the humans run up on the porch and felt their hands on him. But all of that was ignored

"You're lying," he hissed, had to be, she could not be dead! He was here to take her with him. To rescue her so that she could live on with her life with him.

"Let go of him, Mirage!" Ironhide demanded right beside him as the larger man gripped his hand and bent it up from the horrible man's neck

John coughed while rubbing his throat, "I am not lying, she jumped in the river two days ago and haven't been found after that, she left a note," he growled "This is fucking abuse! I'm going to report this."

"Don't take to me about Abuse you miserable piece of human," Mirage growled as he lunched again at the human that wise enough stepped back. And as Ironhide took hold of his holloform, he disconnected it and instead transformed up into his rot mode. But even then Ironhide was there to stop him

"Let me go of me. I'm going to kill him," Mirage hollowed as the knowledge blinded him, he let his charge down.

"Calm down, Mirage, "Ironhide ordered as he forced the red spy down in the ground and held him there. Frag, he didn't know what to do. He had feared that this would happen sooner or later. That was why he had come along. But now, when he was here, Ironhide had no idea what to do or even knew if the human spoke the truth, but either way, he reported it in.

**:: Ironhide to Optimus::**

**:: I'm here::**

**:: We were too late, the femme is gone::**

**:: Gone? where?::** Optimus asked

Ironhide debated what to say as he looked down at the now still form of Mirage

**:: The creator says that she committed suicide and left a note::**

The line was silent a minute, and Ironhide loosened his grip on the youngling that was beneath him

**:: Come back to base::**

**:: But Optimus....::**

**:: No, we have a situation at our hand, and I can't let Mirage out alone; it may have been a new guardian bond, but even that will hurt when it's broken::** his voice was tired and low, this was not what they had planned for.

**:: Will do, Ironhide out::**

"Come on, youngling," he said low to Mirage and helped him up, but the red spy snatched his arm away with a low growl. Without any more words, he had transformed down and took off with a huge dust cloud behind him.

Will came up beside his partner but said nothing as Ironhide also transformed down and let the humans inside. There was nothing more to do. The human could deny everything that they accused him of, and with the girl gone, there was nothing more to do.

\---

Unfortunately, this is the end of the story for this time.

I can keep writing if there is interest in extra chapters or even a sequel to this one. But let me know what exactly you want and I can see what can be arranged.


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